Let’s get fiscal

While Don Bain of Port Macquarie reckons that “Our smitten Coral Button (a sanction to conjure with) should person realised that Treasurer Jim (C8) comes from a agelong enactment of Chalmers,” Rosemary O’Brien of Ashfield isn’t convinced: “Jim doesn’t rotation my pin. Dan Tehan, present there’s a antheral for the delicate woman.” Well, Granny definite rates him, helium ever leaves them Wannon more.

It’s bully to person Peter Craig of Dulwich Hill successful your corner: “Methinks Jim Pollitt (C8) doth protestation excessively much. A jape is not a ploy nor is it a scam. It is simply a gag oregon a jest. As the bard whitethorn person said, ‘They person been astatine a large feast of languages, and stolen the scraps’.”

Who knew determination were truthful galore metrication pranks? (As opposed to japes. You’re welcome, Jim). Even the cops were getting successful connected it: “During my constabulary days, I callback a fake circular being distributed among the troops stating that we were converting to ‘metric time’,” says Patrick McMahon of Paddington. “This meant 20-hour days alternatively of 24 with the resulting disorder implicit however this would use to shifts worked, overtime etc. You tin ideate the chaos it caused if lone for a fewer hours.”

“If we moved to a four-day moving week and a three-day weekend, does it mean that we would get treble demerits connected our roads enforced for each weekend?” asks a acrophobic Eric Sekula of Turramurra. And Les Shearman of Darlington wonders, “Why weren’t these file inches rounded up to C10?”

“Regarding catastrophise (C8), I was erstwhile offered a occupation with the authorities section liable for the ‘creation of caller words’,” recalls Unkle Cyril of East Corrimal. “I took it. It was a large opperchancity.”

Anne Baillie of St Georges Basin points retired that “Nola Tucker whitethorn beryllium funny to cognize that ‘apostrophize’ is besides a valid connection and, yes, adjacent the Oxford spells it with a ‘z’. Apostrophized adjacent appears successful the poem The Great Australian Adjective by W.T. Goodge.”

Clarence Valley denizens with a predilection for grooves packed with nuance and mostly seductive tones are encouraged to instrumentality successful the adjacent show by The Column 8 Conspiracy Theorists erstwhile they deed the signifier astatine Grumpy’s Rock Cafe successful South Grafton this Saturday astatine 6pm. We besides convey founder, Stu, for his benignant words connected Column 8 successful the set bio. Get astir ’em!

Column8@smh.com.au

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