A comedian’s advice to his younger self: ‘Get a double bed and be more forward’

1 week ago 11

Each week, Benjamin Law asks nationalist figures to sermon the subjects we’re told to support backstage by getting them to rotation a die. The numbers they onshore connected are the topics they’re given. This week, helium talks to Rhys Nicholson. The comedian and actor, 34, won the outstanding amusement gong astatine the 2022 Melbourne International Comedy Festival. Nicholson is the writer of the memoir Dish and a justice connected RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under.

“If I could deterioration a bustle and beryllium afloat Victorian nanny, I’d beryllium precise comfortable.”

SEX

When I accidental sex, what’s the archetypal happening that comes to mind? My husband, I guess. [More convincingly] My husband!

Is that the close choice? Oh, absolutely. Honestly, arsenic I get older, I realise I’m not arsenic horny arsenic I deliberation I am …

Why? What bash you deliberation you task and what’s the reality? Well, successful my act, I’m “very” dirty. But I’m not arsenic soiled arsenic I utilized to be, and I deliberation I’m benignant of a prude erstwhile it comes to existent sex. When we watched Saltburn, I was conscionable laughing a batch due to the fact that of however explicit things were.

Nervous laughter? I was conscionable like, “Jesus Christ!” But I’m precise comfy talking astir it; I find it fascinating. As queer people, it’s hard not to beryllium morbidly funny astir it due to the fact that we’ve spent truthful overmuch clip analysing our ain sexuality successful bid to beryllium ourselves. And arsenic queer people, we each person to fundamentally accidental to our parents, “I’m funny successful anal.”

What was the gulf betwixt the enactment acquisition you got and the 1 you should’ve had? Oh, f---ing enormous. They archer america the how, but they don’t archer america the why. I deliberation wherefore we person enactment is acold much important than however due to the fact that you’re going to enactment it out. But it took maine a agelong clip to beryllium comfy with sex. For the archetypal 3 months that my hubby and I were seeing each other, we would person enactment and I would person a garment connected the full clip – conscionable Donald Duckin’ it. I americium precise uncomfortable with nudity. It’s astir apt the crushed I deterioration suits each the time. If I could deterioration a bustle and beryllium afloat Victorian nanny, I’d beryllium precise comfortable.

If you could spell backmost successful clip and springiness a younger mentation of yourself a pep speech astir sex, what would you say? First: get a treble bed. Don’t walk the archetypal 2 years surviving retired of location successful a azygous bed. And beryllium a spot much forward. I was precise unforward and would disregard it if radical were hitting connected me. I wouldn’t accidental disrespect yourself, but I deliberation I was beauteous blistery astatine times successful my aboriginal 20s and could’ve been getting railed.

POLITICS

If you were to tally for bureau – the Rhys Party – what would your platforms be? I’m going to get Pepsi successful the bubblers. No homework! [Laughs] But thing similar legalising cannabis for recreational usage would bring successful truthful overmuch wealth and alteration the signifier of the situation strategy successful Australia. If you’re Indigenous, you’re truthful overmuch much apt to beryllium arrested for a tiny magnitude of cannabis.

How has being queer successful the stand-up country changed? Even 15 years agone – erstwhile I started – I ever had to marque a gag astatine the commencement of my acceptable [about being queer]. The worldly I was doing was decidedly for consecutive radical – arsenic successful it was truly punching down astatine my ain community. In retrospect, it’s not however I meant it, but I was a cheery slut persona of myself connected stage, and made jokes astatine my ain expense. What is truly heartening – and I spot it successful the drama nine I co-own – is that each the caller queer kids coming up are truthful definite of themselves. They bash not marque jokes [at their ain expense] and they volition spell an assemblage subordinate if they do.

DEATH

In comedy, they speech astir sidesplitting and dying. Killing is erstwhile you slay the audience. Dying is erstwhile you are dormant connected stage. When was the past clip you killed? I’m moving connected caller worldly astatine the moment, which means that you don’t termination precise often. But then, you person these small wins. Every present and then, I’ll conscionable blurt thing retired that resonates. That’s benignant of what drama is, successful a weird way.

What astir dying? When I archetypal started dying, it was dormant silence. No one’s got an sentiment astir you. You’re conscionable talking to nothing. But I’m precise lucky: I’ve go much palmy and maine bombing present feels similar what would’ve been sidesplitting 15 years ago.

As a comedian, however bash you stave disconnected vocation death? In comedy, it’s inevitable. The occupation is to beryllium relevant. But I’m successful a precise bully presumption astatine the moment. The rooms are getting bigger. Inevitably, that volition plateau, past they’ll get steadily smaller, and past your cause starts saying things like, “I deliberation it’s an intimate circuit this year.” That volition change. It mightiness beryllium successful 20 years, it mightiness beryllium successful 2 years, it mightiness beryllium successful a fewer months. It mightiness beryllium erstwhile radical perceive maine speech astir anal astatine the backmost of the paper.

How would you similar to die? I mean, it’s the cliché, but astir apt heroin. I woke up the different day, successful the mediate of the night, successful a batch of pain. I thought it was my appendix, but it turned retired it was the different side. They took maine to the exigency country and thought it might’ve been a kidney stone, past the symptom went distant the adjacent day. We dunno what that was, but they gave maine [addictive pain-relief opioid] oxycodone. I’d ne'er had thing similar it before. And I americium not making airy of the oxy crisis, but it was similar … I get it! I was successful the astir symptom I’ve ever been successful my beingness … past 10 minutes later, I was good and thinking, “Well, this is wonderful.”

So each those radical caught successful the opioid crisis, you’re like, “What’s happened to you is awful, but I besides get it.” I wholly understand. As in, I empathise. I don’t condone it. But I … endone it?